26 June 2008

Don’t Make Critics Angry

I'm in Great Britain now, so it's an appropriate time to quote Peter Bradshaw in the Guardian on the new Incredible Hulk movie:

"Hulk. Smash!" Yes. Hulk. Smash. Yes. Smash. Big Hulk smash. Smash cars. Buildings. Army tanks.

Hulk not just smash. Hulk also go rarrr! Then smash again. Smash important, obviously. Smash Hulk's USP.

What Hulk smash most? Hulk smash all hope of interesting time in cinema. Hulk take all effort of cinema, effort getting babysitter, effort finding parking, and Hulk put great green fist right through it. Hulk crush all hopes of entertainment. Hulk in boring film.
Don't make critics angry. You wouldn't like them when they're angry.

Via Jason Kottke.


Anonymous said...

But fans of the Hulk comic books love this version and hated Ang Lee's art house version. Do we count?

J. L. Bell said...

Count? Yes. The box-office grosses of the new Hulk movie are muscular, and that's what will matter to the studio.

Indeed, the movie's doing especially well in Britain, which is the sort of thing that makes movie critics who disagree with the popular response, as Peter Bradshaw did, feel weak and ineffectual.

But every so often movie critics get to burst out of all their clothing but their purple pants and clobber something they don't like, using their skills as writers. That, more than the verdict itself, is what I found entertaining about Bradshaw's review.